Wow everyone, thank you so much for all of your supportive feedback. I am weaving my way so gratefully through it all. Some of it I just keep rereading, enjoying the feeling that there are other people who are not looking at me and nodding with that concerned bewildered face, but who actually get it somewhat (even if your experiences are different)

I am also working slowly through the references. Thank you for posting direct links Those are helpful! Mark, I did not understand what you meant at first about hormones. I was thinking, ha ha, no kidding. But then I looked at the links from Esthersdoll that Lara put in. Wow. That is food for thought and I am working through them.

I am talking to my husband about having a more direct talk with the kids about my situation. They have heard a lot of it already, but we will try to spell out some of it, maybe distill it down to a couple of the basics that need attention at the moment. Thank you for pointing out that I should be doing this.

Thank you for also thinking that it is a good thing not to multi-task. I don't mean to sound strange, but I feel like it has been a huge spiritual gift to discover that I should only do one thing at a time. Everyone else in the world seems to think this is crazy, and sees it as a sign of something I have to recover from.

Separate from this, I also realize that my depression is a huge problem. I contacted my neurologist this week who directed me to my psychiatrist and I am finally going to have to change some of my meds. I have taken meds for depression for years on a stable dose since before the concussions, and I have resisted changing them since the head hitting and have tried to "brain rest" through the concussion changes rather than adding more meds to help the emotion problems. But this week I realized my depression has gotten really bad again similar to right after the July concussion, along with feelings of being "crazy" - I don't know how to explain it. (No suicidal ideation, I am very aware of that.) So I will try this route.

What do you think? I thought that time was supposed to just make it better, but am I going to have to take more psychiatric medications for ever or for a long time? Do you think these changes are permanent? I know various docs say yes, no, maybe, but I am asking from the point of view of personal experience. I know that having prior depression/mood disorders makes it harder to recover. (I am diagnosed with cyclothymia and major depressive disorder, mild ADD, mild Tourettes, and I know I have a lot of sensory processing issues.) How am I to think of my life and my self now.

Thank you all so much. I do feel very alone. I am glad to find this forum, very much.

Julie