In all seriousness Ragtop, are you receiving treatment for your Anxiety issues? And you say you have turned down ADs, is that an rx for Depression or using the side effects to treat symptoms. If the former, and you do not have treatment for Anxiety, I urge you to seek some. These conditions make physical symptoms worse and feedback to increase their own levels of severity if left unchecked.
As an aside, I'm also a 53er living in the body and brain of a 90 year old - but my mind is still 23.

Dave.