Quote:
Originally Posted by EnglishDave
Dear Eva,
You go through such a lot every day and you find the Strength to share with us, your Friends.
So, from me to you - for the first time to anyone:
In the '80s I drank and smoked (illegally here) to 'cope' with pain and severe Anxiety issues. This was on top of popping beta-blockers like Smarties. This was daily, but I was never an alcoholic, it NEVER affected me my tolerance was so high, but I had no cravings or withdrawals. I just got mentally relaxed with the mixture.
Staying up til 2am, I was fully straight by 7am the same morning. As the years passed heavier abuse led to nil reaction, work wasn't affected - I was even able to 'function' within small groups in the evenings as my Anxiety was drowned and smoked out.
I realised that I was consuming 2-3 times as much as before with no real effect after 7 years or so. I decided on a change, quit my job, sold my house, broke off a relationship and moved 250 miles, cutting all ties with my previous life. I haven't touched a drop, nor smoked, since. In 27 years I have only spoken to 2 people on 3 occasions from my 'past' life.
Dave.
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dear Dave
thank you for sharing
i with everything going on
and to now be a S.S. recipient
and to have found the best coverage
a new drug company
i want to express
how having to go through my own physical breakdown
ruptured disc
that was the beginning of one horrific situation after another
making the conscious decision not to take my antidepressant
and am very angry of having to take pain meds
my cardiologist put me on xanax been on it during my changes ya know woman stuff
now my shrink dispenses it
one time i was on 1 mg tab 3 times a day
brought myself down slowly
to 1 tablet
he said not to be uncomfortable
and after a while i could see i needed two in my day
so bottom line i have to tell you as recovering alcoholic
my choice a drink it kills the pain at a low cost
as i just learned having to find a drug plan part D
my one pain med Oxycontin one month supply is
$997.00
not to mention the other meds
then the cancer
another 5 years of those
are you getting the picture
there are so many things
a slave to them
depressing
so blanking depressing
to have worked so long in
my staying away from that first drink
never to have abused my meds to date
doesn't sit okay with me
i hope i have been able to have opened dialog
as it too is my medicine for life
i am a angry depressed person
for many reasons
and i know if i do not work on it
my character defects are at their best
it has been a while since my last drink
and i would be gone if i ever thaught
i can abuse my meds
i take medicine not drugs
me