Canagirl,
Agree with everyone.
Maybe call your GP and tell him you are feeling hopeless and suicidal and would he please help you.
Many of us have been there....truly. We get it. Please get yourself help or ask a family member or dear friend to call a local suicide hotline with you.....they will help you....You are not alone.
Taking your life seems like an option when pain and anxiety and your horrible neuropathy are out of control but THERE IS HELP. You just need to get to the right pain mgmt doc. I felt exactly the same before I got good pain control....Please dear one....reach out for help....no one is better off without you.
You are in my prayers,
Diandra

http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/