2 weeks and a wake up till I see the new neuro . Of course this one also sees other neuro patients so could be out of the pan and into the next one. But my PCP did give me a script for Cymbalta to help with some of the pain, hoping that by relieving a bit of that it might slow the spasms a bit. We shall see.

In any event when I go to see the neuro hopefully she won't think I'm being too difficult of a patient when I list off the pharmaceuticals I've tried to date to help with the symptoms. Relaxers, anti-convulsants, narcotics, anti-inflammatories and now anti-depressants. As well as the drug list I can't take, anesthesias, cortisols and anti-histamines. (which aside from the cortisols I don't think the other two should be an issue, but who knows)

I do know that PT is pretty much off the table too though. Maybe not OT, but PT right now isn't going to work. I've called all the providers on my insurance's list and all of them say the same thing "Too many things... pick one" well if I could simply pick one thing to focus on, I probably wouldn't need to go to PT. And also from past experience, with those "too many things" they're all connected. You can't work on a leg without affecting the back, can't work on the back without affecting the legs and neck, can't work on the neck without affecting the shoulder and back... and so on.

And my soon to be ex-neuro wasn't any help even when I had seen her last. She could only suggest yoga..... really.... PT won't work for me so how about I place myself under the care of someone who has ZERO medical training cuz there's no way that's not going to end well.... Oh and swimming, forgot she mentioned swimming as well, to an aquaphobic suffering from body breaking muscular spasms... why did I like her again?

Yes, sure, I have largely overcome my fear of water, and my girls are lifesaving floatation devices, but still, I had also tried swimming last year. Knew activity was necessity, and in strengthening the muscles through swimming I ran into tons more issues with the knees, back, ankles, neck, shoulder and hand.

Is anyone else having spasms that are causing very real damage to their bodies? I mean they are literally tearing apart the soft connective tissues in my body. Ligaments and tendons being torn asunder by nothing more than muscular spasms. Bones being fractured, healthy bones, with excellent density, broken by muscular spasms. It doesn't just 'feel' like my body is ripping itself apart, it actually IS.

Honestly I really don't know what to do about it anymore. I am at a loss for ideas. I can only hope that the new neuro will have something more to offer than 'go for a swim', which now is starting to make me wonder if my other neuro was telling me in a roundabout way that I should just take a long walk off a short pier.