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Junior Member
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Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: New York
Posts: 53
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Junior Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: New York
Posts: 53
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Hi Deuce,
Regarding rest: this obviously varies from person to person, and even from moment to moment, but rest doesn't necessarily mean physical rest. My worst enemy is my mind, and so I could be lying down struggling to meditate and be "working" at it very hard. My thoughts can be so taxing at times, that what would appear to an onlooker to be "rest" actually feels to me like dangling out the side of a speeding car on the freeway. By the end of one of these episodes of mental mayhem, I have usually experienced symptoms return.
Then sometimes I'll go for a walk and return home feeling completely refreshed. The physical exertion being significantly less taxing than the mental. Or I've discovered that I can sit down with a pad of paper and draw thoughtlessly for an hour, and likewise, feel totally soothed afterwards. Other times neither of those work at all, and I have to try for something else. And then there are days when nothing seems to work, and I just have to clutch to that speeding car till it stops or I fall asleep.
There's definitely no clear answer. But keep playing with different methods and don't give up!
__________________
-First TBI in 2011. Iron cellar door closed on my head. Undiagnosed PCS, and was unaware of anything regarding TBI at the time.
-2nd TBI in August, 2014. Fell skateboarding and hit head on pavement.
-3rd TBI in November, 2014. Hit in the head at work with a dish rack with full strength by a large employee. CT scan normal. Diagnosed mTBI, PCS, PTSD, migraine with aura, and chronic depression. Symptoms have included: quite severe visual disorders, hearing loss in left ear, lethargy, brain fog, dizziness, disordered sleep, hallucinations and "exploding head syndrome", neck and shoulder pain, migraines, headaches, loss of emotions, all forms of cognitive deficiency, loss of reading/verbal ability, sound/light sensitivity, anxiety, panic attacks. Most notably are a general loss of identity and the disillusionment with the world accompanying trauma. But on the other hand, a new and heightened awareness of the nature of self, others, and of suffering itself.
-As of December, 2015, am still experiencing visual disturbances, memory and speech problems, balance, sensitivity and overstimulation issues, along with the trickier to pinpoint cognitive changes, but feel that I am no longer clawing my way through a waking hell, so feel much better about being alive. Hallucinations and panic attacks are gone (thank God!), getting much better at reading and writing, and remembering/planning my daily tasks. Hopeful for further recovery, but thankful to be at least at 50%.
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