Hi falldc,

I hope looking at the sites was helpful in some way.

I totally agree with you, many of us unknowingly do or say things which are considered "emotional abuse." We have grown up in environments where some form of emotional abuse was the "norm" and have no idea some of our behaviors, or behaviors of our loved ones, may be emotional abusive.

The key is in raising awareness. Not pointing fingers and blaming someone else. Taking responsibility for our own behaviors. Sometimes, when partners are made aware emotional abuse has been occurring, both take actions to ensure healthier interactions.

It's a joy to see your written response.
Your response shows a lot of insight. Gaining insight and perspective is critically important in eliciting the most favorable outcome, whether you both stay together or eventually part ways.

As for your plans this weekend: Is there any option of seeing your old friends at another location? If so, your husband may join if his behavior has shifted. If his stance remains the same, you won't miss out on seeing your friends. Just a thought.

You are in a very tough situation. Any compassionate person would feel very guilty for leaving.

Some of these emotional abuse services/sites/hotlines can be very helpful in helping us to better understand the situation, better understand our feelings, better understand our options. They often provide validation and support.
Most understand if someone feels s/he must remain in the relationship for various reasons. They don't require someone to leave the situation in order to lend support.

There may also be local services for you, a local support group or counseling, etc.

I do hope you will consider getting some additional support, whether you stay or leave.

My heart goes out to you. You are currently in a truly difficult position.


DejaVu

P.S. Have FUN as often as possible!