Hi Kay,
You are doing well. One sign of this is the amount of insight you have into yourself and into your daily life right now.
Simply asking the questions you are asking shows insight.
It makes sense that you are not sure of what you are looking for as an emotional "norm," the target you are trying to define and trying to achieve.
Medical conditions, as well as the effects of medications, can, over time, cause us to loose a sense of what feels "normal" for ourselves. We can also lose self-confidence and no longer trust ourselves, our own perceptions.
I like how your doctor is handling allowing you to find the doses and times of daytime meds which suit you best. I feel she is showing confidence in you, in your judgment and is helping to restore your self-confidence.
You are very highly motivated to bring your life into balance. It's inspiring to witness someone so motivated!
I believe you will have an increasingly accurate sense of what's just fine for you, as for energy levels, goal-directed behaviors, and more.
Self-compassion and patience help us so much in our finding balance in our lives.
You are working hard to heal, Kay. Not everyone works so hard at this. I have a lot of faith you will find the balance which serves you best.
You are truly doing an amazing job of caring for yourself.
DejaVu