Dearest moonstar and Christine,
Thank you so much for understanding the feeling because we are moms and ill. Im soory moonstar that i havent written back intil today. You both have shard your feelings and yoour guilt I have not been able to email back my headaches and other problems are getting worse and I have been in bed straight without even getting up for the restrrom for over a week I cant get my head off my pillow I go Thurs. to get the MRI . I am scared beause know matter what the see my specialist says Im up the creek. I had my mom finally come Sat because I had home health social worker came to help see if there is things that would help me and she knows what aresa to go and my thinking isnt good anymore so I needed someone here. my mom came I knew this lady before when my dr asking for this she asked what do I want to do I said not be here anymore I dont and cant do this . She had tires in her eyes we spent alot of time together before and she know what kind of mom I am and it was sad for her to hear me say that knowing me. My mom even had a sad look. She said that because a week before a nurse was out and said it might be time for hospic to get involed I saidd no .I worked as a hospic nurse all my life half my live for 15 yrs about. she asked me if I thought about assistance living I said yes when my son is in college he will be in 10th coming up school year see said okay for now but to think specially after the test them i said what the nurse said she said oh really okay then she was going to check into long term necause what they do is get people who will and people who care and love me together and talk will a PHD annd tell them how imporant it is ffor supporting me in things I need and how I feel and how they fell I looked at my mom and she she yes that wouls be great I said yes then maybe they can understand me, so we will see.I dont think my mom will and my dad has cancer for the second time and he is 8 hours away and we both have pulled away. so there is no one but people here and Im on myspace and I have meet wonderful people and small groups that are getting chairs and meds and things that we cant get for them so I get to talk to them eeryday when I can I started helping with a concert here to raise money for them so I have gotten involved but the headaches have slowed me down I cant do much now and I cant drive anymore so its taken that away but they people are coming here on the 5th for an intervieew her daughter is 16 and she is very bad right now. But THANK YOU BOTH FOR BEING HERE AND LISTENING AND TALKING AND I HOPE WE CAN DO THIS AGAIN AND CHECK IN WITH EAACH OTHER.......................My hearts go out to both of you Im here anytime to I can listen also so please use me................Thank you....I want to wriye more but Im having a very bad day. I will let you know what happens........

GENTLE HUGS TO BOTH AND REALLY THANK YOU Karen / rsd kitti