Quote:
Originally Posted by Brokenfriend
Hey Kay. My NP asked me to think about possibly changing the Luvox to a different medication for OCD in the future. I've thought about it, and I think that it's a good idea.
I've had periods of time where I was tormented with these thoughts for 6 months, or more. I never have known why that happens, and I guess that the Scientists don't know either.
Every since I've been medicated with several meds at a time, I haven't experienced the 6 to 9 month periods of fear, and depression complicated with OCD.
I also have a case manager, councilor, and a NP backed by a psychiatrist. This team of people are helping me to stay above water. I don't know how I managed to get through school with these problems. The problems were taking shape, forming,and getting worse. I dropped out of my second year in college. This is when we didn't tell anyone what we were going through mentally.
When in High School, and after, I drank alcohol for the first 10 years when I could get it. I just didn't know what else to do.
I remember that I had a bad Spring years ago, and my dad made a comment that these problems usually happen in the Fall with people in your condition. This was years ago. I've been through so many head trips after people have given their opinions about my challenges. They have(((NO CLUE)))how wrong they can be. (((NO CLUE!!!))) They make it sound like it's my fault. There's nothing enjoyable about this. Where did they get the nickname "Funny Farm", and, "Cuckoo's nest"? There has never been anything funny about these subjects to me. Sorry for the vent. BF  |
A specific type of thought I have is very bad. It's the only OCD-related thing that didn't totally go away when I was hypo/manic. The seroquel and a benzo help them come less often. But my OCD as a whole is worse now that the hypomania is gone. I know these types of thoughts can be tormenting.
It sounds like you've put a lot of thought and reflection behind your decision to change your med. And it sounds like it will be a good change for you. I'm glad that you have a team to help you. You need that support right now BF
I dropped out of college twice before I finally got my act together. I finished all my prerequisites, and was in my second semester of nursing school when MS became disabling. I'm so impressed that you were able to finish school in the face of all those obstacles. I can't imagine how hard that was for you. It's a sign of true resilience.
I drank very little after my s/s attempt in Dec. and haven't had a drink since July20th. I was a social binge drinker, and ended up as an alcoholic. I always had problems with anxiety and, of course, alcohol loosens you up. My bp, OCD, and anxiety are all worse since I stopped drinking but I won't drink again. I know you were able to stop drinking years ago. And that takes a lot of strength, especially if you're facing MH problems, too
I think that you're stronger than you give yourself credit for. You have been through so much, but you have been able to fight through it. I know you're still fighting, but you've just made a decision to change meds and get yourself some new ammunition
Kay
p.s.
I hate when people use the little information they absorb about bipolar disorder to try to educate me, tell me what I should do, or tell me what my real problems are. Despite my husband's claims to the contrary, his understanding of bp remains poor, and he thinks that I have control over things that I do not. I don't argue with him and I eat up his criticism. Sometimes I wonder why I tried so hard to get better. I'm tired of the stupid things that people say to me about my mh in general. As a result, I keep a lot to myself. And there are family members that I have cut off from ANY information on the subject.