Hello!

In november 2013, two days after my 23rd birthday, I went to the hospital for a foot operation and ended up with a concussion. Now my 25th birthday is getting close and I have really mixed feelings about it, since it's also the second anniversary of my concussion. The problem is that I still feel far from good.

What happened was:

Just before leaving the hospital I fainted and hit the back of my head on a bathroom floor. Woke up very, very confused. Had absolutely no idea where I was or who I was. I had this strange feeling of living another life and suddenly waking up in a unknown situation.

Anyway, I had to be lifted back into bed and was informed that I "Probably never fainted that long time before". Later my dad talked them into letting me stay overnight, since this was a small hospital some hours drive from home. I was placed in a small room and told to "relax and watch some tv". By this time I knew who I was and remembered what had happened. I tried to watch tv, since they had turned it on for me, but I had a hard time staying awake.

The next day (a Friday) I was sent home, still very tired, confused and with a bad headache. Spent the weekend trying to read, without any succes. So Monday morning I went to the doctor and got diagnosed with concussion. Got sent to the big, local hospital for a CT-scan, which looked ok.

A few weeks of more or less bedrest followed. By spring I felt better, still couldn't watch tv or use the computer, but managed to enjoy a trip to Amsterdam with a friend. By summer I felt even better and went to the cinema (with sunglasses and earplugs), which together with a hour of kayaking, gave me bad migrenes for two weeks.

In the Autumn I tried to start studying again, even though I still couldn't read and projectors gave me very bad headaches. I managed a month before I had to quit.

I don't know when it turned, but sometime after that it just started to go downwards. Right now I feel like my head hurts more and more, and I feel more and more tired.

A year after the concussion I finally got to see a Neurologist, and started trying different medicines. So far I have tried two different blood pressure-medicines (not a good idea since I have unstable blood pressure), a epilepsy-medicine and a epilepsy/diabetes-medicine. Since none of them worked I was scheduled for botox-injections this Tuesday. I have had a problem with fainting (especially when I was younger), so I was lying down. However, after seven injections in the forehead I fainted and the Neurologist decided that botox wasn't anything for me.

One thing that really worries me is that my fainting has changed drasticly. I've fainted approximately 15-20 times before, so I know the feeling and how I react. I used to wake up quite quickly and feel okay long before anyone else allowed me to get up. However, the two times I have fainted after I hit my head, I have been unconscious for longer time, I've had cramps (which I've never had before), I have no idea where I am when I wake up (and I'm "dreaming" while unconscious) and it takes a lot longer for me to recover. This last time I had to be rolled out to the car in a wheelchair. Afterwards I slept 4 hours and then 12 hours the next three nights. Also, previously lying down or drinking water have prevented me from fainting, while I have now fainted one time while drinking water and one time lying down.

I don't know what is going on, but it scares me, because it just feels wrong. I mean, I had 17 years of experience when it comes to fainting, and then two years of a totally different kind of fainting. Do anyone know what this could be?

I also wonder if anyone have any tips on getting better? I'm so tired of being tired all the time.

I get headaches from all electronic screens, music, fluorescent light, driving in a car or bus, boats, using an electric toothbrush, running, walking to long, long conversations, etc. Do anyone have any ideas for activities? Appart from resting I mostly knit, listen to audiobooks, colour in colouringbooks (by Johanna Basford) and sometimes solve jigsaw puzzles. I try to take a short walk every day, but find it hard to know how much I should pressure myself.

The symptoms I still have are:
-Daily headaches/migraines
-Dizziness and vertigo (feels like I'm going to fall when I close my eyes, because I don't know what's up and what's down)
-Tired/fatigue
-Very sensitive to light, sound and vibration
-Difficulty with memory and concentration
-Still can't read longer texts (like newspaper articles)
-Struggle with everyday things like making food, going to the store, washing clothes, showering...
-Difficulty finding words and talking

I know I should be positive, but right now life just feels like an endless waiting time. I also find it difficult to really belive that I will get well.

Sorry for my bad language, I'm Scandinavian and my English isn't what it was before my accident...