Seth,
I do feel guilt about my botched recovery too. It was a very weak hit from whiplash into a towel rack that gave me an initial concussion. I, like you read in my other note made it way worse by drinking and continuing to work and not rest for the first few months. I think guilt is sometimes hard to ignore, but we absolutely need to remember we were working on the information we had, and the innate risk threshold we possess.
As for exercise, I had been working out everyday for about two weeks while in my extremely dark and maddening phase. And I stopped for about 3 days, and after the rest had a day of immense clarity. I worked out on the day I felt clear, and immediately felt worse. I know the example is perhaps too specific to be helpful, but I definitely felt it drained me to the extent that my brain could not use energy for healing. I am now back in my dark maddening phase unfortunately, hoping for another day of clarity that I could prolong, but have not worked out at all. The stop in working out has in this case not helped. But, I will keep you posted as I plan to make use of my gym again soon, and will let you know if fogginess returns.
Hang in there. Take strength from every friend that you can. That's whats getting me through this crap time. Best of luck to you!
Quote:
Originally Posted by seth8a
Many of you are familiar with my situation here on NeuroTalk. Throughout this ordeal, I have actually been doing a lot of exercise, including cycling and running. These efforts have never made my symptoms worse, and I'm fortunate in that aspect. (What makes me feel worse is work and bad sleeps, generally). I've decided to really slow down my exercise exertion recently, however, so that I will have more energy and time to spend with my family, and I'm actually starting to feel worse.
Should I start it back up? What accounts for things going a little bit south while not exercising? I firmly believe that my continued cycling has actually helped me maintain my sanity.
Also--why does ones perception of time and even the wholly larger aspect of the calendar year in general seem so off with PCS? I was reading to my girls tonight and kept thinking it was March. At 7 months into this, time seems of irregular nature and goes by in a blur. I guess maybe that's just being in my 40s with a busy family and work life, with some PCS thrown in. There are some times I feel like maybe I'm as good as I'm going to get, and I'm trying to accept that. There are days that I feel good, and feel glimpses of my old self, but that is usually dashed the next day when I feel totally whacked. This means that life might just kind of be an off-kilter blur for the next 40 years.
Does anyone else feel like they brought this on themselves, or a variety of guilt about the incredibly botched recovery? I almost feel like I'm being punished for something. When I let it, this is by far the most challenging experience of my life.
Thanks for all the great help on this forum.
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