BF,
I can't imagine drinking and taking Seroquel. It's so potent once it kicks in I feel like if I had had a few I'd go to sleep and not wake up. When I want a beer, I think of that, too. Congratulations again on your two decades

You're going to have periods when your emotional pain is worse than others. It's part of the grieving process. Sometimes it's the time of day, when it's quiet, or when something reminds you of your losses...

We're here for you BF. Anytime you need us.