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Old 11-07-2015, 02:48 PM
Ragtop262 Ragtop262 is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Midwest
Posts: 381
8 yr Member
Ragtop262 Ragtop262 is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Midwest
Posts: 381
8 yr Member
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cliffman View Post
I look fine, walk fine but feel so disconnected to everyone that can walk & use their hands without any pain.

I had dreams and plans for myself just like anyone and now they are all gone. Not sure what to do..........
These two lines hit exactly on the way I often feel.

When I walk through the grocery store, etc. I look at others and wonder if they are in pain the way I am. I wonder if I could see it in their eyes if they were. I wonder if they can see the pain in my eyes.

Like many, I saved for and dreamed about what I would do in retirement. Now I've had to accept that it will probably be earlier than I planned, and not nearly as much fun.

Yet, life goes on. I like to ride my bike - I can still balance fine and biking hurts much less than walking. I read books. I enjoy good wine (I know its not good for me, but I figure enjoying a little bit of the really good stuff is better than swilling down bottles of the cheap stuff). I drive my old Camaro as often as I can, even though its tough to work on it any more. I enjoy spending time with my kids. I listen to music, although I don't hear it as well through the tinnitus. Like many here, I watch TV and movies (I love the new leather recliners they recently installed at the local movie theater - so much more comfy, I can kick off my shoes and put my feet up.)

So, I still enjoy life - just a lot less vigorously than I used to. I'm fortunate that I did quite a few of the things I wanted to do earlier in life. My father had a lot of plans for retirement, but he became ill and was able to do very little by the time he retired. One of the last things he told me was "do the things you want to do early in life, because you may not be able to once you retire." Truly words to live by.

Sorry for the ramble, probably didn't help at all. Just know that everyone finds their own ways to cope, and their own ways to enjoy life. You just need to be willing to take a different path than you thought you would before PN became part of your life.
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"Thanks for this!" says:
antonina (11-07-2015), Cliffman (11-07-2015), janieg (11-07-2015), mrsD (11-07-2015), zkrp01 (11-08-2015)