With my daughter in a rehab once again
It is a vicious cycle
A vicious cunning work of evil doings
It strips one of themselves forever
The cells forever fried from the use of the drugs
It has taken a turn for the worse
She now added herion to her list
"It's only been two weeks"
As if two seconds were okay
What is it that needs to happen for her to
GET IT
I know what I speak of
I know when my bottom was
Though I was never ordered to ever go
to a recovery program
I walked in one Sunday morning
after now memory of three consecutive days
and I thaught to myself
What if something tragic would have happened
to my children
I was so frightened to the thought of them hurt
And in hind sight that is exactly what happened when I lost myself in a bottle
That feeling of numbness I could always count on
I could ALWAYS count on "it"
Oh how sorry I was to have become a drunk
A DRUNK
I wallowed in my own crap
It was a tough life alright
And ALCOHOL MADE IT HARDER
sobering up was no fun either

To now watch my children suffer with addiction
When they were early teenagers I entered the rooms
I was taught how to do it one day at a time
It did not happen right away
My child is suffering getting sober
She was taken to a mental hospital by my boy
It is a place of relapsed suffering people
Now I know never to give up on one
But I can't make her drink the water
What the blank does she have to LOOSE
for her to get it is the hard part to watch
I watch her pain of being addicted
And to think
"Oh, it was only a two week run"
What else
What else
So much has gone on in the last three weeks
And in the end things got done
But not WITHOUT A FIGHT
Everyday a fight
Every single day a fight
Unsettled lost she feels she just can't do "it"
It is now we need to once again lift her
and pray she is on the wagon for an even longer ride
Meetings ARE my saving GRACE TO BE AMOUNG persons who were exactly where I was
I know where my daughter is mentally physically and most importantly spiritually
I am certain she has hard facts she must face
things like her daughter and why they aren't together
What she does not understand yet
She is waiting
As I am
Patiently
But
I don't have to explain the pain
and sorrow of watching it
She was able to call her brother
This is a good thing
She called
And disclosed
Me