Quote:
Originally Posted by waterwillow
Thanks Kiwi and Jamar. There is a history of Paranoid Schizophrenia in his family. Drink really exacerbates this. He takes no meds and will not go for any assessments.
I am a little happier that you guys feel we are doing the right thing. Deep down he knows we were always there picking him up, lets hope he can see that he needs to make even a small step to help himself. The extended family would be there for him but threatening our safety and at times our lives, well I have to draw a line in the sand.
He is at risk presently of loosing his job after 30 years, they have been very understanding but they can no longer accept him arriving smelling of alcohol.
Hey Jamar, you did good and now your helping others. Take the credit where it's due.
A deep thanks
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Dear Waterwillow,
Such a difficult position when you are trying to love and support a family member in dire need of help.
I agree, you have no choice but to withdraw from his life before he hurts someone in the family, himself or a stranger.
He needs to hit rock bottom and not be enabled by those around him, despite the enabling being done from a place of caring.
Have dealt with similar situations, sometimes withdrawing means they get arrested and spending time in jail for their behavior and obviously, a forced and very painful withdrawal from alcohol. Some people have to hit absolute rock bottom before they wake up and change. 30 yrs of this behavior is not something you can turn around overnight, obviously but his painful withdrawal will give him the wake up call that 30 yrs has not. I know it sounds cruel but the fact he is still alive from 30 years of heavy drinking is incredible. I am guessing his liver is not in very good shape.
I commend you for hanging in with him this long. You are obviously a very caring person.
In the long run, hopefully, he will realize you withdrew out of concern.
Wishing you the best in dealing with this painful situation.
My best.
Diandra