You are the only one that can say if this is the right program for you. Maybe it's time to explore other options and then make a decision what is the best treatment for you at this time. It also sounds like you have been under additional stress with 2 deaths in the family. That will raise your pain level and make it more difficult to cope. You might keep that in mind as you are trying to make decisions. I love the endings to your posts, "Believe in the Strengh of Faith and Hope, within there is Peace and Love" Wishing you strength, faith, hope, peace and love~mac