Quote:
Originally Posted by SamG11
Things at school are basically the same. They suck. Feeling awful like this makes school so hard and so dreadful. I hate it. There's so many things wrong with it. I feel like I'm not even there, I can't do homework because I feel 10x when the school day is over, everything I'm learning is nonsense, ugh I could go on and on.
My mom talked to my guidance counselor at school, and she made sure my teachers were aware of whats going on. That's it. I'm not on a 504 plan because jumping from no additional help to a 504 is a big leap. And everyone is making it seem like its a huge deal and that If I feel better one day its impossible to get off. I don't know, I'm writing this so depressed and I just want to cry but I can't cause my family wont understand why and everyone will make a big deal about it. My body hurts. Everything's so hard for me. It's not fair.
I will reply better once I get a hold of myself. 
Why do I have to be the one to deal with this? I don't get it, I just don't. I don't get life anymore at this point. |
I choose to suffer alone because I know my husband won't understand what I'm going through, I can't predict how he'll react, and I want to protect him. I tell him only what he needs to know. I do have a couple of confidants, but I can't share everything with them. I rely heavily on the support I receive on the bipolar forum.
Choosing to suffer alone is a hard way to live. It's much easier to face problems when there's a support system in place. Isolation leads to feelings of loneliness, which is yet another issue to deal with.
Are you allowed any privacy if you feel you need to cry? It is a good way to release emotion, and many people feel better after a good cry.
I can under stand not wanting to get trapped in the 504 plan. It shows that you are optimistic that treatment will help you, and when you feel better you don't want to continue to be treated as someone who still has problems. As long as your teachers understand, and you are able to find accommodations outside of a 504 plan, I can understand you rejecting it.
I understand your frustration… sometimes life can be so overwhelming that everything can become a chore. It's a common symptom of depression. And when life becomes unbearable, it's natural to ask "why me?" Of course, there is not answer to this question, but when I find myself asking it, the only thing that has worked for me is trying to remind myself of others who are much less fortunate than myself.
Hang in there Sam
