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Old 02-17-2016, 02:29 PM  
Wintercat
Newly Joined
 
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 1
Default I am scared. Desperately trying to quit alcohol

I've been trying really hard to get some help for this. I am 29 years old and I've been drinking 5 tallboys of beer everyday for 14 months. I guess I thought nothing bad would happen.

One morning I woke up and I felt really weak. Later that day I started getting twitching muscles. They started in my feet (I could actually see muscles in my feet twitching), and this progressed to other parts of my body. Basically my muscles will twitch at random parts of my body. After looking it up and seeing the words, seizures and DT's I realized that I just really made a huge mistake by drinking so much.

This all happened a month ago and since then I have been trying to quit. It's not the cravings that are bothering me, it's the muscle twitching and the fear I get when this happens everyday. I tried cutting down first, since it was reccomended by someone online. They said cold turkey is dangerous...which I found out on Day 2 of my cold turkey attempt.

I have went from 4 beers, to 3 beers, to 2 beers, to 1 beer in about 20 days time. After that I felt like I was good to go with quitting. I stopped drinking beer. I felt fine for about 8 days.

Then it happened. I got major tremors and twitches all over my body as well as paranoia, anxiety, my mouth keeps watering (salvitating), and also I feel clammyness on my skin. I feel shakey, irritable.

So last night I drank 2 beers and that made the twitching go away but it's back today.

I've been avoiding going to the doctor because I keep trying to do this myself but I feel depressed that my efforts of weaning off only resulted in my body returning to twitching everywhere. It gets worse when I try to fall asleep and almost feels like electricity in my legs and I will jump up.

Will this ever go away? Is this normal? Is this dangerous? I really need help I think. I am seriously thinking of finally going to the doctors tomorrow and admitting my shame. I feel so ashamed.

I feel depressed because I was SO proud of myself for cutting down and quitting for over a week. I was really happy and thought I had this beat. But no...now I'm back to square one with the weird tremors. I feel like beer isn't fun, it's just a medication to help me not wind up dead.

What should I do? Did I permanently destroy my body? My birthday is next month and I feel like my life is over.

Any advice or support would be great for me right now. I feel like I have nowhere to turn to.

Thank you.
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