as much as i want to go off on your sister... i just encourage you to get as much help for yourself as possible. it sounds like your sister has a lot of serious problems and has shown you that she is selfish and has no capacity to help you whether it be emotional or on any other level (even though you were such a jewel to take care of HER responsibility and became a mother to her son).

i have had to re-evaluate my life in so many ways as of late. i find that i can not bear to be around so much negativity and have taken steps to remove myself. it hasn't been easy and i don't claim i have the answers to your problems. i can't even compare.

however. just look at where your sister is. she may never thank you for what you have done for her. obviously she can't see it and has to lash out at you for being in pain - which is so incredibly horrible - but it is something you can do nothing about. she might never change and the rule of thumb is that you can only change yourself.

hats off to you for being such and incredible person with such a huge heart. you deserve a party...