Right now I do not have any alternatives figured out. It is one of several things that I am working on with my psychologist. Things have been this way for far too long and something needs to change. It is something that I am not sure how much longer I can deal with. It was fine when I was able to get away, head to work, work in the yard, canning, cooking, head to the basement to the spare room. Now those things are no longer available as something I can do. No where to escape, so little I feel I can do. It has taken its toll on me. Having to deal with this all day, every day for a little over a year, plus the problems we have had before this, have pushed me back down and feeling hopeless.

We have been doing well these past couple of days. I just do not know how long it will last this time. A few days, maybe a month or two, I never know. I need to figure out those alternatives and be willing to act on them when the time comes that I need to.