I just lost a long post.
To summarize:
I just got back from the gym, planet fitness. Walked for 45 minutes 2.5 miles.
I had been there last 11-27-15 that was 107 days ago.
Since 11-1-15 I have gained 20 pounds.
This has me very depressed.
The medication changes made last year proved to do more harm than good.
The trazadone made me manic.
The decreased in geodon did nothing to improve my memory it only lowered my thresh hold for hypo mania and uncontrolled drinking. Yet somehow I did have a period in january that I was AF for 21 days.
March 22nd was my first AF day in 5 weeks. I was AF for 5 days straight. I felt like my sanity had returned and I was able to control myself again. I had a planned intoxication day this past friday night in new orleans. and had 4 drinks over 6 hours on easter sunday at friends house, using alcohol in social situations where everyone was drinking.
Back to AF tonight and I plan to be AF during the week and moderate drinking on the weekends. That is my harm reduction goal.
My risk reduction goal is to not drink and drive again. PERIOD.
At least for now this is what my goals are.
Will see if I can make it to the gym more often. need to be able to walk long distances if we are going to take a trip somewhere for our 20th wedding anniversary trip this summer.
I can do this.
bizi