When that time comes
Will all be left behind
Do we take anything that we experience
Here on earth
Do we have memory of the ones we leave behind
Or do we enter a kingdom filled with lost love
Is it a place to rest the weary body
To awken in pain and not be reminded every single day
What happened
What happened
I do not know just like that one day
I woke to go to work
And that was it
How do I leave the memory of the pain I feel every single day
Then having to take care of my family
In every way I could possibly give of myself
And to be left here to deal with it alone s.u.c.k.s
Heavenly Father where are you
Please come to us
Ease our pain
It hurts to not have anybody to lean on
May my prideful ways be the reason why I am alone
I question again myself
And want to slap myself
I did a blanking awesome job with what I was left with
I took the bull by the horns
In the end just cannot do it anymore
What is left but to just be
Just be
No can do
Eva is someone I have to get up for
It is sad what happened to this body
It had been through hell and back and taken in the end
I cannot begin to tell anyone what this body is going through
My hands and feet
The bruises from veins that swell and burst
It is painful
My feet and hand are always cold
Ice cold
To forget when this all went south
To touch my neck to feel what he did
The back of my neck forever changed
To the touch one can feel the manipulation
And the permanent shape not the natural curve
That is gone
All gone
Changed
Not for the better
To have to move is a task
I get it done
I have no choice
No choice
But to do
Just do
What can I leave behind
Me