eva, everything you said is everything i feel. it brought tears to my eyes. not because i am sad but because it is good to know that someone understands what i am going through. i only wish that you didn't have to go through it too. its not fair. but it is reality and you're right. we have to be a bit selfish to preserve our own health as best we can. i dread the late night messages and calls too. my heart skips a beat and is filled with dread. the same fear you fear. that i've lost a loved one to addiction. i hope and pray it doesn't come to that for either of us. and thank you for giving me the strength to keep going and keep it together. i've cried all the tears i have right now and need to keep the Faith that he will get better. but right now i feel like he's slowly slipping away from me, like when a child loses grasp of their balloon and cries as it quietly floats up into the sky out of reach and out of sight. but always remembered in our hearts. thank you again for caring. please always remember that i care too. love and hugs.

P.S. i am so very Proud of You for all that you have achieved and overcome. it takes Strong person with a good heart to be able to keep going when things are tough. and it takes a beautiful Soul to be able to share their struggles with others in order to help others become stronger too. thank you for helping me gain strength. love and hugs from your forever friend.