thank you, too, artist.

well, since you asked - here is my update.

i have left my husband for stealing my drugs and nearly pulling my (RSD) arm out of socket. i am living with my sister (9 of us in a 4 br. house). signed up for food stamps, healthcare, monetary assistance and the homeless coalition today. the transmission went out in my van yesterday. i found out my mom is dying of cancer and now i'm 4 hours away. i am having an absoultely horrible time with my arm and hands and truthfully when i lay down i can feel burning all over my stomach and chest.

i am weeping because i truly want to die. i feel that i have no one to give me encouragement other than this forum because everyone i know is pulling me in a million different directions. my husband has no remorse about giving me a horrendous flare with no meds. my sister and i are at each other. my (divorced) dad and mom want me home. my friends tell me to stay away because my husband is dangerous.

i know how you feel, artist. i have no money. i literally left my house with a baggie full of coins, a couple of baskets of clothes for me and the kids and my bike strapped to my van with extension cords. i can't work designing (pending logo project) or teaching music.

i feel so stupid depending on strangers to pull me up. but the people i know just don't get it. they just don't get it. i'm losing it and i'm sorry

i'm tired of my world crashing in on me day after day. there is no stability in my life and i just want finality