Awakened with that doomed feeling I haven't felt for a good number of months
That feel good moment when starting Deplin
This I'm sure is situational triggers of my mortality going where
I should be at this stage at least
Having made a decision not to get involved with any other man and raise my babies
This was a conscious choice at 24
And I followed through
Not to have that I could wait for as I thought I was still young
I will have my time allowing that someone in my life
That wasn't in the cards
I live the woman side of life
And kept my children away from "them"
Not yet
Having to turn men away that wanted to take care of me and my babies
This I did do
And when I thought I did what I needed to
Raise them to be responsible young adults
It would be my time
I have my good long time brief companion
That fills a small void
Cannot have him in my life regularly
Divorced he is one child
We get together ever couple of months
And time is rolling on by
I am feeling very lonly
Very lonly
Have been awakened at how persons are really
And that happened over night
One moment to the next
Forever changed
Not anybody to hold like I imagined after I did my job raising them
Not happening
And I'm not interested in the kind where a woman is expected to put themself out and put out
Just look into my eyes and tell me what you see
Me
Me