Quote:
Originally Posted by moondaughter
Dear Niggs,
T h a n k y o u friend .
I'm so sorry that you and your wife are haunted by such an insidious threat-nothing like a shadow of death to bring the world into sharp focus.
I'mm wondering...how old are your kids? Will you be able to keep your home after bankruptcy? Are you not responsive to levadopa? I think it is such a good thing that your mood which you can initiate through exercise etc can override any drug effect? How do the agonists help you to function better? My very brief encounter with a non therapeutic dose of liquid deprenyl citrate was that it really really landed me in adrenalineville and I only realized it when talking to friends on the phone I became aware of my own narcissism and realized it was the drug talking and I didn't like it...in fact it scared the @#$%%&& out of me - its those eureka moments of grace I feel humbled and my ego overrides those enough as it is w/o adding adrenaline to the mix. Perhaps though we need a strong ego to carry heavy burdens...I mean,doesn't it seem like.the hero archetypes embody a healthy expression of uniqueness, individuality , and self-esteem (all prerequisites for courage)?
I feel this is such an important thread as it asks a question few endeavor to answer..conveniently overlook-thanks again so much for sharing a look into your world through your heart. Its posts like yours that truly matter to me.
Dylan Thomas, 1914 - 1953
Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.
With kind regards,
MD
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A kindred spirit, I love poetry and post regularly on 'creative corner' this piece is one of my favourites.
MD, my daughter is 18y and has just started reading History and English at University. My son is 14y and still lives at home. I was a contact lens Optician/specialist and had a small modest practice. It was nothing special but gave us a reasonable living. After 5y of battling I had to volunteer to hand in my registration as I felt it was only a matter of time before a client accused me of something . Since then my beautiful dedicated ladies have valiantly tried to keep it going while I try to sell, such loyalty ! but alas it's now in tatters and I still have not managed to sell it. I desperately hope to void the bankrupts court as I would lose the house and would struggle to get a mortgage.
2 y ago my wife had oral cancer due to an auto-immune condition, she survived technically but was butchered and suffered terribly during treatment.
We've been told because it's auto-immune it will return in 4y or 40y nobody knows, she is a woman of immense courage and inner strength and remains to me as beautiful as the day I met her.
I am dopa responsive and know I get benefit that comes from dopamine increases but stress is devastating to me. I know stress makes us all worse but it's the degree to which it incapacitates me that makes me wonder. I can go from being briefly almost normal to being like a statue.
Another thing that makes me wonder about other neurotransmitters is I cannot tolerate anti-depressants whether 1st gen fluoxatine (prozac) or newer citalopram. Even St.Johns wort and 5-HTP make me very ill with what seems like panic attacks or serotonin syndrome. (fluctuating bp,pulse,tingling,restlessness/agitation)
Scandanavian Pet.scan research announced a short while ago that contrary to current medical thought folk with diagnosed anxiety ie social phobia not depression had elevated not depleted levels of serotonin. Which could be why I can't tolerate anti-D's they're just piling on the bad stuff. Taking it further I wonder if serotonin acts as a master n.transmitter and as it rises it inhibits dopamine sooooo when stressed serotonin rises and dopamine falls, as I chill the reverse happens. It's all speculation on my part but wonder if I need serotonin reducing drugs as much as dopa elevating.
With regard to ropinirole (known as rock n roll here) it's taken me 6y to properly tolerate this drug and each titration takes min 6 weeks to settle Iv bumped up from 8 - 16mg and I'm still not sure how much it brings to the party. it and stalevo may be very proficient were it not for stress induced anxiety.
One final word on supplements, st johns wort and 5-htp work as anti-depressants and cdp choline/citicholine works as an agonist. How do I know ? because when Iv tried them the side effects/tolerance problems are exactly the same as the prescription only equivalents.
Wishing you love n mercy
Nigel