There are more than one antidepressant available. People react differently to each one. A good doctor will understand the differences.

You still have not told us what your work is like. Do you shovel dirt ? Do you do computer work ? Do you sell widgets ?

It sounds like you have also not mourned your past so you can move forward and reinvent yourself. If you were A runner and lost a leg in an accident, would you expect to be able to run like you could prior to losing your leg ? You would lose you jogging/running friends and others who did active things with you.

It sounds like you are not even at a true diagnosis of your condition/functions. Some of your symptoms may be resolvable with some work-arounds and accommodations. You may need to make some changes while you learn how to reinvent yourself or what other steps you can do to move forward but you have us to lean on and learn from. We need to understand more than the general concepts of struggling and being depressed.