Junior Member
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Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: New York
Posts: 53
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Junior Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: New York
Posts: 53
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The hit I received last Monday was unfortunately enough to bring about a return of symptoms. Even after a week off of school, and even in the most serene environment I have available to me, my cognitive stamina is further diminished, and my vision and balance more impaired than they have been in 6 months. Being that it occurred during my midterm week, the timing is impeccable. I am decimated. Tonight I am so depressed I can't even begin to describe. This surpasses anxiety and disappointment for me - it amounts to full blown dread. I saw this as being my only opportunity to move forward, and now it's slipping away. I don't know what I can do from here. I'm even ashamed to be writing this.
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-First TBI in 2011. Iron cellar door closed on my head. Undiagnosed PCS, and was unaware of anything regarding TBI at the time.
-2nd TBI in August, 2014. Fell skateboarding and hit head on pavement.
-3rd TBI in November, 2014. Hit in the head at work with a dish rack with full strength by a large employee. CT scan normal. Diagnosed mTBI, PCS, PTSD, migraine with aura, and chronic depression. Symptoms have included: quite severe visual disorders, hearing loss in left ear, lethargy, brain fog, dizziness, disordered sleep, hallucinations and "exploding head syndrome", neck and shoulder pain, migraines, headaches, loss of emotions, all forms of cognitive deficiency, loss of reading/verbal ability, sound/light sensitivity, anxiety, panic attacks. Most notably are a general loss of identity and the disillusionment with the world accompanying trauma. But on the other hand, a new and heightened awareness of the nature of self, others, and of suffering itself.
-As of December, 2015, am still experiencing visual disturbances, memory and speech problems, balance, sensitivity and overstimulation issues, along with the trickier to pinpoint cognitive changes, but feel that I am no longer clawing my way through a waking hell, so feel much better about being alive. Hallucinations and panic attacks are gone (thank God!), getting much better at reading and writing, and remembering/planning my daily tasks. Hopeful for further recovery, but thankful to be at least at 50%.
Last edited by Beelzebore92; 03-27-2017 at 12:24 AM.
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