To not have a father in their lives in a positive way
To have not focused on them and not me
Sad but true
The one who seen it clearly
Is my youngest
Never coming between them
She know where my heart lays away
And am always to be found when they need me
I support them trying to find the answers they look for
I have a son who has been surrounded by women
His three sisters
Me my two sisters
My mother
It must have been difficult
A mother no matter how much she tries to help fill it by taking them to all sports available
It turned out to be softball
But even then he was treated differently by the adults
My boy is 6'8" tall
He was always two heads taller
And lanky
Oh how they wanted him for basketball
He wasn't interested
Eventually left softball as they expected so much more because of his height
But I tried
And he knew that
And as time went by
And they got older and technology was first introduced when they were in high school
Everything changed
And I guess I didn't change quick enough or not change at all
I do not like it when I have company and the phone is out in front of them or in their hands
But you have a very valid important assement
As I had a father around

But did so much harm

And having divorced so young
I trusted nobody with my children
It was a choice not to be involved in their lives
It hurt when he applied for emancipation from them

Yes I sacrificed much for them
They owe me nothing
I expect nothing
I chose to not ever be involved with anybody

And it was one less fear I did not have to worry about
If my father was capable of doing what he did to me and my sister and a mother who knew and turned her head when crap was happening
I don't know
What would you do
That's what I did

They grew up without a dad
As a dad should be in his son and daughters life

Conscious of this did the best I could
That's that

Standing on the sideline
The love never stops
The dreams to come true
Lots of love
Me