Hello Mark,

I have actually read these forums many many times in the past when I used to have an anxiety episode.

In response to billbobby, my hypochondria started because I had some sort of a work project and needed to keep my mind extremely sharp. However, I got into several "scares" such as being in a very rough jerk in the car as the taxi I was in jam braked to avoid colliding into something.

Afterwards I actually contacted a harvard researcher on brain damage and he said that all hits to the head actually cause some level of damage including sudden jam brakes in the car, football headers etc, but it is only with a large number that we notice symptoms. Thus my hypochondria.

over the next month my mind became destroyed. I had a devastating combination of OCD,Anxiety, Hypochondria. What would happen is I would accidentally hit my head somehow, have an anxiety attack, and then repeat the action again and again tens of times to "allay" my fears over whether that casued brain damage. Thankfully, nothing caused brain damage in may.

However in June I had a fever and was recovering. The day after I recovered I was still on some panadol and out of it. I accidentally smacked myself hard in the face (my arm suddenly shot up) while adjusting my hand (I sleep on my hand) (somewhat like a palm strike) , as I lay down on my bed. unfortunately due to my OCD and anxiety, I did this many many many more times. My sinus area then started to bleed.

Went to the ER, but I underexplained the situation, telling them it was just "a few" hits. The ER upon hearing that, much like Mark,thought I couldn't get a concussion from that. Said I fine and cleared me. Then I went shadow boxing, jerked my head around violently with every blow etc.

As for the pushing on the head, imagine this. I put the heel of my palm on my head , lay down, and pushed my head in (much like you would massage a sore muscle). At that point of time I was not in a good psychological state due to all the trauma of the initial concussions. I was actually suicidal.

I did this for 8 hours, not being able to sleep through the night. It served as a sort of distraction. By morning I felt strangely dazed unable to speak fluently and had this inability to think sort of like I was drunk, and the next day I felt hot all around my head internally. Then a very heavy pillow fell on my head from an overhanging cabinet.

After the pillow fell I suddenly felt some numbness at that area of the head. Went to sleep and woke up not being able to remember my age for 10-15 minutes. Also could not quickly recollect what had happened to me before I slept.

The problems got worse and worse , and soon I could not type coherently nor think coherently. Stuff would come out with strange grammar and all, weird sentence structures. I started to feel this "blockage" at that area (right frontal lobe) and it bothered me day and night. It wouldn't "turn off" when i wanted to sleep , wouldnt "turn on" when I wanted to think. It was devastating to a person who used to think alot.

I notice my mental declines extremely significantly, and feel that I might have done so much damage to myself because of my psychological illness that there is no recovery. Others have only gotten hit once, but me...100s (not an exaggeration, in 8 hours alot of hits can be done) of times during the recovery week.

I wish it was anxiety Mark, I really do, but I think my OCD and psychological problems screwed me up physically and destroyed my brain.