I do agree a lot has to do with ones view and self esteem. I do feel people need to focus on themselves and not on others especially if its not a person close to you. People always like to give there opinion. It was such a hard part of my weight gain recovery when people would make weight comments. I think if everyone focused on what they needed to do to be healthy and happy the world would be better. Everyone is different and has different needs. I can relate Melody as my family has many ed suffers. I'm in recovery but health wise recovered. The mindset is daily. Anyhow my mom is anorexic,my gramps is compulsive eater/anorexic,his mom was anorexic. I could go on. You do learn coping mechanisms from family whether negative or positive but I'm learning I have to live my life and using food or weight in a negative way is not the way to find the life I want. I'm sorry for all you have been through. I can remember when I was in the cardiac unit and 40 pounds under my gramps gf said don't gain too much weight. Comments are hard. Have you told your mom how that makes you feel? I hope you can see what I see in you or well hear. Your such a warm,funny,caring person. I would feel so happy for you to be my friend. Hang in there and those muffins sound yummy. I don't know if I told you I got a muffin top pan to make the tops like muffies.