You are still in recovery from your original injury. Your self-induced stress of nit picking every detail means you do not yet know what your long term recovery level is. You need to find a way to let go of your need to define every little thing. This obsession with every detail is very stressful and indicates you have more recovery to achieve.

As I have said before, Many do not see a good recovery until they either learn to let go of their obsessions with every detail or maybe get professional help and maybe medication to lower their anxiety and obsession levels.

You sound very driven. Your combative hobby also suggests a self-medicating to give you release from your intense look at life. Competitive people tend to struggle to let go of the details.

If you tore up your knee in combat, would you expect to be able to return to combat sports without a need to moderate your level of intensity?

Knees and shoulders rarely recover fully so athletes know to protect them. The brain is less able to heal so you need to protect it.

The studies show that those who learn to accept their brain as injured and work within its limits will do much better. Those who constantly fight every little setback will live a life of misery.