So Miss BO was told to leave Wednesday, by Thursday threatening self harm, begging to stay to the end of the month. DB realised while telling me I was just not interested in hearing anything about her. I said again, I’m not talking about her or alcohol, I am concerned for your mental health. But, that said I do believe you will be able to think & see your future more clearly once she is gone from your life. I have said he can call me any time he likes. Surprisingly he looked calmer than when I last saw him. Perhaps telling her to leave is as he suggested “the first step he needed to take to sort himself out”. The new dog is quite small, bossy and cute and he’s been told when the 2nd one arrives next month, they have to be kept separate. Not sure how he will achieve that in his new abode, it’s not set up like we had here. Another thing he didn’t look into in his haze of lust.

I spoke with his psychiatrist, as I signed a contract with DB in 2015 his psychiatrist is still able to discuss minor things with me. I explained what has happened & he alluded to previous discussions with DB. Bipolar. He believes DB has been on a bipolar high (not sure if I mentioned last year while I was in hospital with BO urging DB quit all his medications other than the testosterone injections) and is now on the downward slide. DB has always resisted/ denied he has BP. Doctor has suggested I try to get DB to consider in-patient hospital rehab, even if it’s just the 14 day in-patient followed by the daily / evening group sessions. The same as he did in 2015 that then lead to him going to the “sister” rehab down South. Doctor agrees my approach is the safest. He asked would I consider DB living here again, I said not while BO is in the picture, I fear for my safety. But, if she is gone entirely from his life & he has lived on his own & if it becomes necessary he can stay in the back half of the house.

I will be putting my needs first & self preservation must be my priority. I could see DB looking at me yesterday- really looking at me. I believe he was surprised at how mobile I am and how good I actually look. I’m not referring to the recent cosmetic I doubt he would notice that. I mean my body and how I’m moving. I’ve lost 12kg & I’m able to get down on the floor with the dog and stand without any help. I think he realised yesterday what he’s lost.