Eva, last year I had a terrible dream I woke from sobbing. My mum had died in the dream. I went to see her that day, she asked me what was wrong, I burst into tears and told her of the dream. She hugged me. And somehow from that day all the anger and feelings of hatred I held towards her for her treatment of me as a child disappeared. I know well how you feel. All I can say is they know not what they have done. An apology will not make me feel any better, I believe she knew what she was doing then. I see glimmers of that woman in conversations, but somehow I’ve forgiven her as I’ve forgiven myself. I was a child, I did nothing wrong. She doesn’t recall or chooses not to, but it makes no difference any more. That searing pain I felt when I was ripped from slumber, I know, no matter what she did, I will always be her child and I loved her then as I do now. Our generosity knows no bounds. We are transparent in our forgiveness of those who have sinned. I know you know what I mean. We wish them no ill.
Quote:
Originally Posted by eva5667faliure
Phone call from baby sister
My mother rushed to hospital
Her heart
Awaiting
Just waiting
The anger I have towards her
But my heart in the right place
Wanting her not to suffer
Waiting
Just another thing to deal with
Me
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