I have a hard time expressing how I'm feeling a lot of the time, too. My best advice is just to talk about whatever is on the top of your head/tip of your tongue- whatever it is. It doesn't have to be related to your mental health, but your therapist may be able to pick up on something and ask you questions...

Some people are just hard to talk to, or a therapist may not be the right fit. I've never had a therapist who talks a lot about herself, or her life like yours does. And I think you deserve one that is gentle

Thinking about how hard other people's lives are compared to one's own usually doesn't work. Your own problems and your own suffering is real, just different. Minimizing that is not helpful

Why do you say you are "perverse"? I don't think that you are at all