Sounds like you’re in the New England area, which is a great place for medical treatments. And since it was from a car accident, most likely, you might see about an inpatient pain management program. The way many of them work is they’ll take images and do an initial review of all your concerns and then begin a full treatment of medication regulation, physical therapy, counseling, assistive aids if needed and even a home check to suggest aids for around the house to make living as comfortable as possible. They also offer family counseling so everyone knows how to deal with what’s going on, like when to coddle and when to scold. It’s not a nursing home, though you do stay at the facility for the length of the program, so they can monitor how you react to the medications, get them scheduled properly, see how you manage with the PT and nutrition (which is another part of it). They see your sleep patterns, your appetite, activity levels all of which helps them to see what it is you personally require throughout the good and bad days.

Normally it is done for stroke patients or patients that have been in critical accidents before they are discharged from the hospital, but perhaps your nuerologist can see about getting her in, even if he might have to wait for her to fall again for EMS to pick her up and bring her to the hospital, which could be the case especially for insurance purposes. I don’t know how your sister will feel about it, it does sound like currently she is in a defeatist mindset unfortunately. And though counseling was recommended for me many times, I always rejected it on the premise that talking about my pain wasn’t going to stop my pain, so I don’t even know if something like that might help her or just make her more resistent to assistance.

Though it does sound like she is in desperate need of a reason to try to change her current situation. Does she have any current hobbies? Any kind of interest in handicrafts of some sort? Pets maybe? Even a simple goldfish bowl gives her a reason to fight through the pain some to give it a few shakes of flakes a day. Jigsaw puzzles, balsa wood villages to paint, crocheting hats for preemies at the local hospital, baking dog treats for the animal shelter, even volunteering at the shelter to sit in with the kittens and pet them, no lifting, no standing for long periods, just holding a kitty in your lap for a bit a of time each week.

Really anything to give a sense of accomplishment, something that might be a little bit tiring or difficult at times but not “impossible” can go along way in changing ones perspective from why bother just leave me to my misery to one of wow look what I did, I helped, I achieved, what else can I do! Maybe even something as simple as learning to read a foreign language if she’s an avid reader, you don’t have to know how to pronounce the words or carry on a conversation in French to read and enjoy Cinderella in the original language, rather like Latin that has become a dead language but is still read by many.