I'm definitely MANIC.

Oh boy, what a big to-do yesterday's appointment was. I met with a shrink AND an NP I've never seen before for about an HOUR. They pretty much wanted to go over my whole psych and med history, and all my current symptoms. I thought the shrink's eyes were going to pop out of his head when he asked how much Seroquel I was on, and I told him 800mg.

Pretty much all they could do was add something else (hopefully) temporarily to treat this episode. I've been through so many meds that the options were limited. It came down to Rexulti and Ability. I've taken both before without any side effects. But Rexulti is marketed for Bipolar Depression, and I took something marketed for that (Latuda) for a hypo episode, I ended up in the looney bin, so I chose Abilify. 5mg a day for now...
It cost me $128 dollars for 15 pills!!! I looked on GoodRx and I can get a coupon for the pharmacy at the supermarket to for $35, so I will obviously be doing that next time.

They wanted to see me again today, and again early next week. I guess they think I'm that bad off...

I came home really animated (and temporarily really agitated because the script cost so much). I can't remember if Corey has seen me that bad or not, but he looked uncomfortable to say the least. I think it scared him.

I'm having a lot of issues with pain and am exhausted because of all the cleaning I've been doing, but I can't relax or slow down. I ended up smoking MJ, which did slow me down, but I couldn't sleep when I tried to take a nap.

So guess what I did?
Last night I accidentally took my night meds twice again. I guess I took my pills and smoked then went to bed. I couldn't fall asleep right away, and a while later, I wasn't sure I took my pills. So, I looked at my phone to see what day it was, and it said Wednesday, so I got out of bed to check my pill case, and the Wednesday slot was filled, so I took the pills...
I'm a f- idiot. I should have been looking at the Tuesday slot, but it was 1am, so of course my phone said it was Wednesday.
I didn't wake up until 11:30am!!! And after all that sleep, I still felt f- up. So, I checked my pill case, and realized what I did. Obviously I can't drive today, so I called and left a message for the new pdoc.
What a terrible time to make a mistake like that!!!

The new pdoc called to ask how I was. She's an idiot. She couldn't follow how much med I took and kept asking. I was getting very irritated. And she wanted to know how I felt the Abilify was working... how the f- should I know? I took 1400mg of Seroquel last night!!! I told her that I would have a better idea tomorrow. So, I guess I'm supposed to call someone tomorrow to tell them how I'm doing... I will probably be still manic, or at least hypo because this episode is a biggie.

The new pdoc is going to try to get me an appointment with my regular pdoc sooner than the one I have scheduled next month... good luck with that.