hope i got your name right!

i am brand new here. but i looked at your post and just wanted to say that what you're experiencing certainly sounds scary and like alot to be dealing w. it must undoubtedly be very hard many days, but it's great that you're still working on things like walking that marathon- even if you get only partway through, that will be a real achievement just that you kept holding onto that goal and working towards it!

best wishes to you.