I feel so alone and empty. I hope I can read. I went out with cecilia for her birthday and it wasn't pleasant. I dread thanksgiving and the rest of the holidays. I just ordered five pints of ice cream. They were all on sale. I hope I don't eat them all in one day. I told myself I can't shop on ebay. I have spent too much money. My legs hurt but I made it to finegans yesterday. I am a mess.