Oh Pat I am so sorry. That is unbelievably frustrating. I'm sure it also leaves you feeling quite hopeless. Maybe if you start a letter writing campaign or email campaign is they probably are now you can see if you can get some assistance from somewhere. Maybe even the hospital with the MRI machine. Or the Imaging Center. Maybe there's a charity? Maybe a grant? Maybe some sort of out of the way assistance program? Maybe a top doctor? Please don't give up. Please keep on trying. I know trust me I know the hardness to keep going and to keep trying it's pretty near hopeless. But I do also know that if you're able to achieve just one little thing it does make you feel better. And just maybe you can get some results and get your MRI. What about a teaching hospital or a university program? I don't know. I know how much that you don't even want to attempt things because most of the time nothing turns out and you have no initiative. I am so glad you have your wife. It is so wonderful that she is there for you all day. Please remember to always appreciate what you do have. Find the littlest things to be grateful for. It is super hard to do but once you make it a habit it is easier. It may Wax and Wane but gratitude does help. Much like energy and hopelessness we are up and down. I have found the talking on this site has helped me a lot. I mean a lot so maybe if you and I keep talking it will help you. I assume that I'm going to go back down. I am positive I will Pat. I am terrified of that. I hate that I get so emotionally unstable around my children. It only happens every few months that they are aware of my weakness. But it destroys me when it happens. Please talk openly with your partner. Also remember each other. I know that with my relationship we didn't focus on each other. All the focus was on my condition and the other we were achieving in our life and our children. We lost each other in the process. Well I hope you're having a better day. And keep in contact