Thank you so much CRPS. I thank you for your advice and you're helping me you are a lovely person. I live in a very poor rural County in California and do not qualify for any assistance that I have looked into so far. But I love your idea of the churches perhaps they can lead me to something that would be helpful so I will look into that. I am not religious but I do believe there is a higher power . And a unifying belief and strengths that connects all people of all religions and types . I had a spiritual experience once and I know that there is something out there that guides all of us. are also no communities I could live in like you suggest. And I don't want to move further away from my children. There is a county nearby that would have more available for me probably possibly. But it is much more expensive to live there and much more difficult for my children to get to. It's funny well not really but kind of I live in one of the poorest counties in California next to some of the most affluent counties in California. I love communicating with you and I will look into the possibility of getting other help. It's quite likely that I could find at least someone there who could help me with talking out my anxiety and depression and frustration. That would be really nice. I am an animal addiction person. I have always been fascinated by Nature and follow many rescue sites and animal sites online. And about half of my shows that I watch on TV are about nature in some way. I love Steve Irwin to. I was so devastated when he died. But his legacy continues with his family and his shows continue to inspire me to this day. My dream since I was a little girl was to do animal rescue of some sort. That is one thing that is very hard that I cannot do that anymore. But most of my pets have been rescues and I'm grateful for that. I also love to reach out online and share my rescue sites with other people. If you're interested in that PM me. There are some wonderful stories letter very uplifting and funny and heartwarming and sometimes sad. But I've really been doing the online thing for the past couple of weeks and it does help me emotionally. To see other people taking up the cause that I feel so strongly about. I am in a lot of pain today. My girls did not have their event today I was misinformed and it's tomorrow. I hope I can go but we'll just have to wait and see. I really think that coming to this site has helped me mentally and emotionally. With you reaching out to me CRPS I feel a connection. Thank you for being there I really mean it.