Oh man this is pretty much word for word the type of thing I would of been writing in these forums when I was your age. Sports and a wreckless childhood I was also 20 when I got injured. The symptoms were there but they were livable, I discontinued contact sports and other dangerous activities but I didn't want to give up chasing girls and getting drunk.

I went hard over the holidays during my first year or so of 'recovery' with all the guys back in town, we drank and drank night after night, man my brain was melting, it didn't hurt but it was so unnatural, so crazy, many trips to the ER with them looking at me like I was crazy. The hangovers... sickening. When you're drinking, it numbs the brain, it makes you feel like you're fine., but it is poison.

I'm 27 now, the alcohol/partying sent me down a dark dark path that took me months to crawl out of(literally) and I've never been the same, 7 years later with severe struggles.. It did things to my brain that I could never explain to anyone. I was so stubborn and so stupid, I deserve everything I am receiving. I am confident if I took that first year of recovery serious and with more knowledge of the consequences I would be recovered today, 7 years later.

That's MY experience. If you choose the same path I did I wish you nothing but the best and good luck. Our brains are different, we've had different injuries, different paths, different amount of injuries, it's all a mystery, it's all a sick joke.