Sorry but I had to post this here cuz really theres nobody i can talk to about this. My friends are over hearing about how Im feeling.

One month and Im full of anxiety. Heart palpitations. Panic attacks. Crying jags for no apparent reason. Each day feels like forever if that makes sense.

Seems everything i do (or dont do) effects me tremendously. Eat sugar. bam. Dont drink enough water. bam. Watch some tv - forget it. Im trying to do the stuff thats supposed to help (vitamins, eat well etc) but each tiny time i veer off that road I crash into an emotional mess. I literally thought "Oh I can watch some TV - its been a few days" but NOOOO

I live alone here in NYC and in lockdown see very few people (for short walks) and im losing it. I guess im hoping it will get better but its just hard and I needed to vent. Its my damn birthday next week - fun!