Welcome, FlowerSun!

I think it's quite likely that the back issues you mention may have a connection with the neuropathy you've been having. To you and me, 40 doesn't seem old at all but the fact is that our bodies do show signs of wear and tear by age 40, and often it's the back that acts up.

This does not mean that you are heading for disability.

Being terrified and anxious definitely isn't going to help and might be making things worse. If you can find ways of becoming less anxious, please do use them. The chances are that your symptoms can be dealt with by some modifications in your lifestyle and/or medicine and/or physical therapy. Surgery should be a last resort, IMO.