hardly sleeping, no depression, out of control spending, reckless, ibs very bad so can't exercise , going backwards there, love my therapist and my caseworker, really doing stupid things. right now i am afraid but will probably have coffee, worried to death about pudgy. she had surgery for ulcerated cornea. now no sight in her left eye. giving her eyedrops twice a day. last night i don't know why but she rebelled when i was giving her the drops and wound up hiding. i freaked too.
didn't sleep all night. i found her once and then she hid again. In the afternoon she reappeared and pigged out on food and drank water and returned to pig out some more.
i have been reading more. adore Tolstoy's non fiction. like my psychiatrist a lot.
something else has been going i don't want discuss. a huge thing.
here i go. going to make a cup of coffee and read. i am so overstressed and overtired. tried falling asleep but impossible. pudge stopped hiding after she ate and drank and then ate again.. stomach doesn't hurt right now.