Welcome, Ravageeject8903!

Sorry I can't answer your question but I've known quite a few people who struggled with drinking. Some people seem to be allergic to alcohol, or maybe it's like an allergy. In any event their bodies can't take it, and yet their bodies may be demanding it.

It's been shown many times over that there are people who just can't tolerate alcohol. You may be one of them.

Many find that an organization of ex-drinkers like AA helps them. I've known quite a few AAers who've been quite committed to the program.

With diabetes and the symptoms you've been having, you're probably going to have to give up on drinking. But these are just one person's opinions and are worth what you paid for them, which is nothing.