I was at Physical Therapy,and i thought about you. First 5 different
Drs.crowded in a small room,trying to out talk each other,and i thought
about how many times i felt lonely,my tape reorder was on,so i thought
when there done they will stare at me.3days in a row to one Dr. than
another in 100 degree heat,and i kept thinking about your words. I
this time when there done, and give me that stare. Well i'll just tell them
what you said even though i knew what they would say. They will
Sue we have some new pills for depression..
I opened my mouth,and the brace Dr.he was new,said do you mind if
I lift your ankles,i promise to be gentle , old i'm sorry that right one would
hurt to much so just let's just try the left. Just do what you want to i don't
care, i said in a snottie voice. He stopped sat down on the floor,and
took your words and mine and others right out,i didn't get a chance. You
have been at this a long time,you must get lonesome. Why would you
say that,what a thing to say i'm not lonely,i hurt,i'm sick of this but lonely,
then i noticed his hand felt different.,i looked at one of those Bionic
hands. I've seen them in hand therpy. But his was not the same,your
hand is different,i just mean your's looks,i don't know. I had a lot of
time to think,i got sick of friends feeling sorry for me and the one's
one's who said well what's wrong with you. You know i would get quiet
and think talk to me the way you use to,i'm human i'm lonely. I believed
he knew what we have felt. Imagine, i asked him how he dealed with it,
well first came anger, depression,pain oh boy pain,and a lot more anger.
But you got all this people around,your back to doing what you wanted
to do,why do you still feel lonely.i did what so many people do to me i
assumeed he ws just fine. He told me they had to move on,and we would
talk later. The other Drs. look relieved.So i guess we will vent, NT,people
and continue to help each other. This has been a good forum,it' been
good to say i feel lonesome and i 'm with people who knows what that feels
like. And i've been feeling that way for a while now.
Sue
I get tired so easy to.