Once I got through the shell shock of my apartment being a lot cleaner and more organized and went through a deep depression, it definitely helps...it got rid of a lot of stress. I still have to get rid of things in one closet and put things that are still in the living area into that closet..I am waiting to see if the woman who was doing the organizing and cleaning and who seems to have deep problems herself is coming back. If she doesn't, I have to hire somebody else. It has become so evident that at this point, I am unable to find the energy or to go against my defiance if that is what it is and do it myself.
My doctor asked me to describe my depression and I couldn't find the words.
Today I finally thought of how to describe it. It was being unattached with pain. Way different from being detached but with appreciation. It was unattached with no connection, no appreciation, just pain...I guess if not for the pain maybe it would like being trapped in a dead body. I don't know how others describe the awful pain of bipolar...it definitely wasn't connected with sadness.
Bobby