Caregiving: Do People Need To Divorce To Afford to Care for a Loved One?


Neurotalk.psychcentral.com has re-printed a heart-wrenching story about a couple who cannot marry, titled "In our hearts we are married." The man needs a caregiver and will continue to slowly decline, until his death. The woman wants to be his caregiver, but she can't do that, and go out to make a living, at the same time. The law doesn't provide for a way to pay her, as a caregiver, if she is his wife. So they had their own mock wedding, and plan to legally marry within days of his death.


"Bryan Eklund and Stefanie Emstrom woke up four years ago and decided to get married. It was a bitter cold day.
They walked into their empty church and knelt alone at the altar, exchanged vows with each other and then hummed the wedding march as they walked down the aisle and out of the building.

There were no witnesses. No minister. No wedding dress. In fact, the bride wore dress pants and sturdy shoes in case she had to physically support the groom.

The next time Eklund and Emstrom marry - the legal time - it will be when Eklund is days from death.

That's because the government will pay Emstrom to be a caregiver for Eklund, who has amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (also known as Lou Gehrig's desease), only if they are not married. Spouses in Illinois don't get paid as caregivers, but the question of pay for spouse caregivers is part of a national debate."

Read this story, by Clare Howard of The Journal Star.
http://www.mindingoureldersblogs.com...ving-do-p.html